DON’T BE SUCH A CONTROL FREAK!
As a kid, I think of surrender as waving the white flag and giving up. Losing. Now I think of surrender as a way to stop controlling things. If it’s so difficult, there may be a reason. Surrendering opens you up to receiving mode. By surrendering, you are now open to getting something else that could be better! God / the universe provides for you. You just need to trust.